If you’ve never seen a sex therapist before, or are curious about accessing a sexology session this post is for you. To start, it’s totally normal to feel unsure—or even a little nervous—about and be curious about what to expect. Most people weren’t taught how to talk openly about sex, let alone bring it into a therapy room.

Therapy isn’t just for crises. It’s for self-awareness, growth, healing, and having someone in your corner as you navigate the messy, beautiful human experience. If you’re reading this and wondering whether therapy might help—you don’t need a more valid reason. That wondering itself is enough.

All relationships have some issues that are not solvable. According to the Gottman Institute, about 69% of issues are perpetual and not able to be resolved due to personality and value differences. This is why it’s so important to learn how to manage them and let go of the idea that everything always needs to be solved, because it’s not so much about resolving issues, it’s more about learning to manage them.

Growing up with dismissive parents can be really challenging. It can result in you learning and believing your wants and needs aren’t important because they were dismissed. This leads you to push wants, needs and desires away and to later find it difficult to connect with them again and truly understand yourself as an adult. 

Safe and healthy relationships help us heal, grow and learn about ourselves. Sometimes that’s in the form of a partner, and other times, a friend. Either way, they hold a massive opportunity for growth. If you’re reading this and have struggled with unhealthy romantic relationships I want you to know that safe and secure relationships where you can grow and heal are absolutely possible.

Having different levels of desire is something many couples navigate. It's called a desire gap. It's totally normal. Just because your sexual appetites differ doesn't mean there is anything wrong. It can be due to a range reasons. This is why it's important to explore what drives and diminishes desire for both you and your partner.

According to the Gottman Institute, a ritual for connection is a deliberate practice that partners regularly engage in to nurture closeness, emotional intimacy, and a sense of shared meaning in their relationship. These rituals are often small but meaningful habits that become part of a couple’s life together.

Are you willing to really hear them, take on board their perspective, and accept their reality?

This is a big one… and one that so many of us find challenging. Not feeling heard or seen is one of the reasons we disconnect in relationship and often it’s got to do with whether or not we are willing and able to see each other’s perspective.

When I work with people who want to understand changes in desire and libido, I use a bio, psycho, social, and relational model. In this post, I will give you an inside look at what the exploration into desire and libido involves and how you can use the model to better understand your own experience of and relationship to sex and sexuality.  

Lulls in desire and libido are totally normal in long-term relationships. The problems often happen because we avoid talking about it. It might be awkward to bring up, but one thing I can assure you from all the research I have read on the topic is …. good communication not only helps you navigate differences in desire and libido, but it also helps you feel better about it because you more deeply understand one another. 

8 things I have seen time and time again that help people create safe, happy, and healthy relationships.

Curiosity encourages exploration, understanding, and growth between partners. It fosters a sense of closeness and appreciation that strengthens the bond over time. Staying curious is important because people change, their interests change, and their desires change. We are always changing and growing, and if we want to grow together and maintain the connection, then we need to stay curious about those we love.